Saturday, March 1, 2008

Head under water

I could have known much better that what happened last night at some parking lot in Marlton is coming my way and I "could have" done something from preventing it a long time ago - it's just I am soooo stubborn.

I have never felt so humiliated in my entire life not until last night - I feel so less of a human that I have stoop down from someone's level and I know much better than that, that I should and could have just avoided it a very long time ago. A LONGGGGG TIMEEE AGOOO!

What I did last night was still in my mind and still very much bothers me, I am not so proud of myself right now, I really-really feel so horrible. I did not imagine that I am capable of doing such a thing - It's scary though...

I learned the hard way
That they all say
Things you want to hear
And my heavy heart sinks deep down under you and
Your twisted words,
Your help just hurts
You are not what I thought you were
Hello to high and dry

Convinced me to please you
Made me think that I need this too
I'm trying to let you hear me as I am



Thanks ever to my dearest friends like Malen, Agnes and Chuva who was there last night listening to my MMK, Pinoy Thiller and Regal Shocker stories. I hope you guys won't get tired of me - Ayan ibinalik na ni Chuva ang isang daang dolyar bwehehehe talo sya eh, ay kayo pala lol... Taasan nyo naman kasi ang bid please? LOL.

I had built a prison of my own self for quite sometime and I had become accustomed to that and had accepted the false premise that I was incarcerated for life. I have sacrifice my happiness for for someone's.

I admit that I had become a puppet and it sucks big time! Am glad that I am back on my feet again...

I would like to thank my sponsors - Arlington for my make up, Mighty Kid for my footwear and Eloy's for my outfit today, thanks and more power!

10 comments:

Joy-Joy said...

ayoko nmang masabihan ulit ng tsismosa kaya hindi na ako magtatanong. i hope na okay ka lang. ok lang yan diwa. tawagan mo si J laro kayo :d uy biro lang ha. wag ka nang babalik dun...

chuva said...

Joyjoy - - okay lang na masabihan kang tsismosa.. tanungin mo? Gusto ko ring malaman no?! ;) Deba - Chizmizan with Chuva nga eh.. :D

Seriously though, sana bilang katulong ko - matutunan mo na na makinig ka sa amo mo. Ilang beses ko na sinabi sa yo na kailangan respect for self bago expect ng respect from others. You'll get through this.. kaya mo yan. Gusto mo pa ng floorwax? ;D

maLen said...

josme, chuva, di pa ba kayo nagkakasawaan ng katulong mo...magkasama na nga kayo mag damag mag hapon sa bahay...pati dito nag uusap pa din kayo hahhaahha

seriously, oks lang diwa. life gets better everyday. give urself a week or two and you'll be fine again. wag na mag sayang ng oras...ng luha..ng kakaisip..it happened na..tapos na yun...the damage has been done...get over it and sikapin na lang natin na mamuhay ng free of guilt, angst and all those negative ions

maganda ang buhay diba? cheer up... :)

maLen said...

PS

nakalimutan ko ang punch line....

maganda ang buhay diba? kasingganda ko...cheer up :)

LOL

diwata said...

heheh JJ!

chuva kaya ako ganito eh kakakain ng flurwax!

malen may tama ka jan!

salamat sa mga taong nagmamahal pa din sa akin at hindi nagsasawa kagaya nyo

toni/nonblogger said...

tsismis na naman? bakit huli ako sa balita.
ate diws makinig ka kasi sa mga mentor mo, sori d ko laam ano talaga problema mo eh.

@ate malen, maganda ka talaga.

Joy-Joy said...

chiva, takot na talaga ako magtanong, ikaw na lang :D baka kasi mabatukan ako ni diwa hehehe...

diwa, makinig ka naman kasi sa amo mo. kaya pag niyaya ka ulit mag casino, go lang! :D

have a nice day.

Joy-Joy said...

*chuva pala :D

diwata said...

hindi kita babatukan ano ka ba? sabunutan lang kita! halika ibubulong ko sayo now na...

Amor said...

bakit ano ba ginawa mo? Nakiki-chismis na ako, hahah!

Everything happens for a reason. Kung ano man ang nangyari sa 'yo o nagawa mo, take it as a lesson para mas makilala mo at makontrol ang sarili mo.

Have a nice day, sana makapasok ang comment ko, haha!