The Therapy...

Yesterday I went to see my Therapist for the first time. But before I see her. I did a little therapy myself. I cleaned my room and the bathrom lol.

[At the office] So I blab right away... (Of course, it's just a 45 mins session. And I don't want to waste any second, minute of it.)

She just listened to my story and the drama of my life. Do you want to know what she told me? (Uh-uh I am not what you need girl! You need a Life Coach! You cu*tsucking b*tch.) Nah she didn't course not. It felt good and right talking to her.

In fairness she is very young and very attractive person. *Sizzles... Awww*

Case accepted! I need to see her at least once or every other week. Yeah, I have alot of issues! I guess. - But just in-denial of it. I don't know cause right now I am very confused and I have alot of emotions inside me just bottled up. It is very good that I have someone to talk to. It helped sorta... No rush am not in a hurry... I know it takes time to heal someone who had been broken alot of times.

I guess I maybe whole outside... But inside me, it's like broken and shattered glasses. I have been in-n-out of abusive relationship in the past... I was once a victim of domestic violence. I use to heal myself. Yeah-huh, I was once healed. But once and again I am broken. That's why I decided to get a help from a professional. I look forward of living my life the way it used to be...

I broke it off the other day, and the next morning I had a chance to talk to my dear friend Le and asked his opinion. In a way he is right. I shouldn't invaded her thing. I should have waited. I should let her do her thing. I should not have not mind her own business. He even told me yeah what if she's just confuse blah-blah-blah... And it's over and done. He even told me that I shou;d have given her the benefit of the doubt. -- Right away I called her. And ask for an apology (Even she lied to me, I still asked for her forgiveness. I am wrong. So, you know were back, in each others pu****.)

I will be seeing her tonight, so I got her a bouquet of pink roses yesterday. After 10 mins. There I go again... I found myself playing FBI and CIA again. I have discovered something. Confirm. They had been together. NO doubt about it. I don't want to go thru the details. I don't want to feel the pain again. - Cause for me right now am fine already. I have accepted it. Maybe it's my fate. You know what? I couldn't even cry anymore.

I will try my best to show her that I still love her very much in spite of what she did. In fact, the way I treated her was as if I was the one who made a mistake. - REVERSE! I don't play CIA or FBI anymore. I promise that myself. Healing begins in me, instead I forgive and forget. Whew tangina! (Son of a bit**) He he he...

"I may be able to bear the pain when love begins to hurt. And when it hurts, I may still be able to give even more. I may be even able to love until it hurts no more." - This is my Iwa Motto Yamamotto! (Barilin nyo ako ng BB gun nyo, Asan na ang guro? Lumabas ka jan!) Paging Teacher Gee!