Saturday, August 4, 2007

Fear!

I am scared for next year, I dunno what's gonna happen to me - to us... I know it's still next year, I still have alot of time to think things over and over and over but time seems really fast especially for someone like me. [Busy person ako no! Kailagan mo muna ng appointment sa akin bago mo ako makausap.] Just thinking of "TIME" it really sucks! As I always tell her... Time is slowly taking you away from me - sighhhh (Sabay buntong hininga na kala mo pasan ko si dabyana!)

She really is decided to go back to Thailand and continue her studies there!- yeah sucks for me, I don't know anyone/anybody there and I don't speak and understand the language! (But I am trying thou...) Matatangap kaya ako ng mga byenan ko? Ibang lahi ako... Hindi ko alam! Bahala na.

We could settle in the Philippines and or in Thailand, but it's the same thing for me... I dunno and don't have anybody there. Not just that, one of my issues are, what am I gonna do there? Like work wise? Will I/We survive? Can my blogging support my lifestyle? (Eh paano kung walang Opps? Dahil sobrang gahaman ang iba jan lol!) How about the American dream? The free honey, cheese and apples that I get every month from welfare, yeah from other peoples taxes! It's really hard to make such decisions like this...

Thailand is like Philippines also... They are also struggling from it's own economy and will never employ someone like me that is a foreigner. [Katulad ko na malaki ang talent fee!]

Anong tarbahu ko kung sa Pinas ako? Call center, na mas may twang pa sa akin ang mga magiging kasamahan ko doon? Kung sa Thailand naman, malamang Madam ng mga babae sa Patpong! LOL. Kung saan liligaya ang mahal ko, doon ako! Supurtahan ko sya. [Bakit ba kasi hindi na lang dito sa Hamerika! Grrrr...] Sinong hahamig ng aking bwanang sustento mula sa gobyerno?

Tsaka ko na iisipin yong pagiging Theravada Buddhist, masyadong strikto... Bawal to, bawal yan... Huwag mong gawin to, huwag mong gawin yan! Waaahhh, pagiging byaning hindi bawal? Bawal uminom, bawal kumain ng baka at bawal manigarilyo dami-daming bawal! I cannot be with someone who eats beef... My Mom told me to break if off, if you don't stop smoking... You not care me... *Echoooooing in mind right now*

One thing I know, the only thing in life that is permanent is CHANGE! [Sa mundo walang sigurado!, kainis sigurista pa naman ako.] Hindi natin malalaman ang sagot kung hindi natin susubukin gawin, eksampol na lang si Reyna sa kanyang mga adventures at misadventures noong nakaraang 2 taon.

6 comments:

Vicki said...

hi diwata,

grabe, sumakit ang mata ko, pati eyeglass ko, nabisak sa kabasa, ang haba naman ng speech mo...
grabe mong naka research.....

balik na lang ako, i need a new eyeglass-reading glass, nabisag-broken, totoo, kasi nahulog...buanga uy...

very interested already, what i read, nahulog pa, nabisag...hay...buing nga,,,mahal pa ang eyeglass na ito, hindi pa bayaran ng Insurance, kahit sabi ko, I need it very badly...

mabuti lang silang magsingil-collect the monthly due....

see, pareho sa speech mo dito....

sigi, balik ako dito, kahit busy sa kalakwatsa, free kasi ang yon love ko, kaya ito panay lakwatsa....

pero. balik talaga ako, makibasa sa very interesting Speech mo....

sigi, thanks for visiting ha?...tc there, pauwiin mo na at palitan mo ng iba....psst...jokes only...lol

bye......grabe ang tawa ko dito sa speech mo, kaya lang hindi na pwede, ssakit na mata ko...bisag pa ang 2 mata ko....bye muna, pero balikan ko ito.....

pacopy nga, baka mawala ito dito....copy and paste ko ha?...thnks........ty

Vicki said...

totoo ha? copy n paste ko....hope ok lang sa iyo,....

thanks again....

My said...

Totoo ba itong speech mo na ito Diwata? Well, whatever decisions you make, be sure you would evenly follow your heart and mind. Kung matutuloy ka sa Thailand, be sure to learn "sawadeka" or "aruy makmak!", he he!

diwata said...

hi tita vk! anong copy and paste nyo? yong sona ba? he he he...

my hindi sya basta press release, nagiisip-isip ko... pero mukang heart ko ang nag decide nyan eh he he he... whatever, basta inihahanda ko na ang sarili ko tumira SEA... nagtitingin ako ng work panay rquired eh Thai National... ano ba yon? eh paano ako? Iran National ako! lol. Sana mabuhay ako sa pag-blo-blog wish ko lang!

gabriela said...

eh bat naman kasi naisipan nyang si manat mo na bumalik sa thailand noh? dito na lang kayo sa pinas. ehehehe.

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